While semi-enjoying a jazz apple today:
"The name "Jazz apple" just makes me need to break out into some Broadway song from All That Jazz, including the little routine where they all do "jazz hands".Should I just go ahead and get it out of my system?"
While eating the apple and noting its flavor:
"Is it odd that this thing reminds me of some perfume I think I may have worn in my twenties?That really strong undertone of overly sweet is just screaming off my tongue.But how screwed up is it that I'm eating something that definitively reminds me of perfume?What the heck was the name of that perfume? And why, perfume makers of the world circa 1990, would you think of inserting the flavor of an apple into a perfume?That's badly warped."
While deciding the apple needed a mask to overpower the perfume flavor:
"I truly pity the poor person who has an allergy to peanut butter.I could live on tablespoons of the stuff, morning, noon and night.UMMMMMM.That's so much better.Now all I taste is PB."
"So, how do you figure out you HAVE a PB allergy?Just all the sudden, one day, out of the clear blue sky, do you go all anaphylactic and need an Epi Pen?I mean, it has to start somehow, right?How do you know these things?Am I subjecting myself to developing an allergy just by eating PB to mask the fact that, clearly, either 1990 era perfumes were injected INTO the jazz varietal OR the taste of a jazz apple was injected into the perfume so we would all feel the need to bite each other?It's all so very disturbing."
Next time? Buying Fuji.