Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Interviewing Your Daughter's Date

Now, it might seem funny or even a bit odd that I would be reading a book about daughters.  I mean, after all, I consider my eggs to be well past their prime, so conceiving another child that might, possibly be a girl is out of the question.  Plus, Mike seems to only throw male seed into the universe, so....

Truthfully, I was really interested in this book because the author, Dennis Rainey, managed to raise four girls to adulthood who were very complimentary about their Dad's technique of picking young men they could and couldn't date.  It involved a detailed interview process before the first date was allowed to even begin.

And, I wanted to know what was in it for me.  Or, more specifically, what was in it that I should be communicating to the boys.

I wondered what goes through the mind of a Dad when a young whippersnapper shows up at his door to pick up Daddy's little girl.  I wondered if it bothered Dads that s.e.x. is always on the mind of teenage boys.  I wondered if I should teach my sons the muffled sound of a shotgun behind a closed door, just in case some body's Dad decided the best offense is a good defense. 

I just wondered.  So, I ordered the book.

Let me start by saying that the book was much shorter than I anticipated.  I went in thinking I'd be reading this for a week.  Instead, I started and finished it before bed one night.  That, to me, was pretty refreshing.  There wasn't much fluff, just good, on point examples and a straight shot to the actual "interview".

I learned that the main thrust of this process is to lay the ground rules for how a Dad expects his daughter and her date to act while they are together.  It addresses the concept that there is mutual attraction, boys think about sex every few seconds, and that purity should be of the utmost importance.

Simply, this plan protects both the young lady and young man who are going out on a date.  Sure, it's the girl's Dad who is having to lay the ground rules.  But, this also plants a seed in the mind of the boy that he is borrowing a precious gift from a man who loves his daughter greatly.

It gives the young man the boundaries he needs to act like a gentleman and not follow the world's ways, which are all about getting what can be had.  And, in this day of rampant sexuality, I think this is a fantastic idea.

I encourage you, whether you are raising daughters or sons, to check this book out.  I, for one, plan to review it with the boys and instigate "Mommy-son" dates where we can put into practice what the book suggests. 
Because, honestly, I want my boys treating your girls with the respect they deserve.

And, even more importantly?  Someday I'll be sitting across an aisle from some body's parents and I would love it if both sides of the aisle were beaming at our children because they did this dating thing the RIGHT way. 

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