Tuesday, January 11, 2011

An Open Letter to Our School Boards

Dear Sirs:
I would like to officially protest the concept that taking the first Monday of any new year off from school is a good idea.

By this point in our lives, the toys/movies/games have all grown stale. In many cases, gifts that seemed a good idea in October, have become frightfully noisy and obnoxiously overused or, worse, broken beyond the point of recognition*.

That cute movie? Everyone can now quote from it with an accuracy that should be reserved for someone who is a card-carrying, union actor.

Games? HA. We've long since determined who is the master of each and now no one will play with any one else who might best him**.

To make matters worse, some sane school boards actually scheduled their calendars so that their kids would be in school on this day. What does this lead to? Complete and utter chaos. Anarchy. Crying fits.

And that's only Momma.

The kids? Completely bored, whiny, and ready to fight with a dust bunny, should one get in the way.

I won't even burden you with the fact that the Monday following our "off" day happened to start with freezing drizzle, causing a delay in school until mid-morning.

Of course, could we sleep in? NOOOOO. Only one of our schools had the common sense to delay school the night before***. The other one? I woke up at 5am and waited until 6:30**** before anything showed up on the school closure listing. Then I barely had time to enjoy a quick nap before springing out of bed to get the kids out the door on time. But, I digress.

Because, SURPRISE!!! Next Monday we celebrate MLK Day. And, guess what? WE HAVE MONDAY OFF.

With my luck, we'll get the second powdering of the year that night. And it will be another non-committal showering of snow that will leave the administration wondering "should we/shouldn't we delay school?" And, guess what? They'll decide on Tuesday morning.

Truly, I don't think I can take another short week. When will I finally have time to get the Christmas letter out? The grocery shopping done before 10pm? The laundry moved from the ironing board*****, the couch, and off the foot board of my bed?

I fully expect, in 2012, that you'll arrange things differently. You are a group of intelligent people. Just send the kids back on Monday and get to work with Mother Nature. You can do it!

For the love of everything good and right, I'm begging you.

Sincerely,
A still slightly sane Mom





*Except by the soles of my feet, which can determine if a Lego piece has just wedged itself into my arch within .0000003 seconds of contact.

**Notice I didn't say HER. That's because I'll play a game I suck at until the cows come home. Eventually, I figure, I'll get a victory. Then I'll be able to shout "WHO'S YOUR MOMMA?"

***Next time, can we please just delay the night before and, if necessary, all out cancel the morning of? I don't know anyone who couldn't have used a little more shut-eye.

****And the whole time? I felt compelled to watch the TV screen, instead of getting coffee. It was UGLY.

*****Where, by this point, it is so wrinkled it should just stay there. But, instead, I'll hang it and deal with the wrinkles one piece at a time. Or not.

1 comment:

  1. I think we should all make copies of this letter and send it in. Start a petition!!!

    ReplyDelete