Q: How Do You Get a New Vacuum Cleaner?

A:  Disassemble the old one, in an attempt to fix it, and accidentally expose the motor, which is clearly overheated and cranky, and then try to fix what you just disassembled with no manual, no experience, and just a short period of time before you need to shower and be ready to go to a play with girlfriends.  Lose your patience with said "fixing" and call the repair shop that sold you the hunk of junk a few years prior and find out it will cost $50 to even look at the stupid thing.  Decide a dark purple, overheated, non-sucking, disassembled vacuum cleaner has but one home:  the garbage.  Recruit son to help carry pieces and dispose of properly, tamping down the urge to call the stupid thing names or beat it to a pulp with a baseball bat, just to give it the proper treatment it gave you over the years.

THAT is how you get a new vacuum cleaner.

Now, I just have to figure out how to find the money in the budget.....