Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes!*

I'm trying something new this school year out of desperation.  Our after school routine, toward the end of this past spring, had gone haywire.  Frankly, after school had become an exercise in S&M, with a side of homework.  And nobody, especially me, was digging THAT scene.

So, this year I've made a major attitude adjustment toward what happens after three p.m.  And, no, it doesn't include copious amounts of liquor.**

See, used to be that I had this "8a.m. to 3p.m. is my time to get stuff around the house done, errands run, workout completed.  And 3p.m. to bedtime is my time, too.  It just happens to involve additional bodies and cooking and homework and sports.  But, we all agree this is MY time.  So don't mess with me."

Yeah, it sucks admitting that I was that selfish, but I was.  Basically, after school became a rush to the finish line called "bedtime".  And, I even rushed that routine or let Mike handle it.  Can you see that I wasn't really participating in this little exercise called "being a good Mommy"?

Yes, with perfect 20/20 hindsight, I see it, too.

So, with a fresh palette called the first day of school, I've made a few changes.  I've purposefully committed my school hours routine to a calendar so I know exactly what needs to get done while the kids are away.  That keeps my afternoons from becoming a time of playing catch-up to the stuff that didn't get done from 8-3, which is what they had become last spring.

My afternoons now look like this:  carpool, help kids with homework, complete dinner***, play board/card games before bed, help with baths****, take several minutes to dig deeper into the day's events with each of the boys/say prayers/give lots of hugs and kisses.

In case you missed the big change:  my new routine involves other people's needs, not my own.  And the rest of my evening, once the kids are in bed?  Involves falling into bed and praying I can stay awake until 9pm to spend a little time with Mike.

It is exhausting being present.  It frustrating to shelve something I started but didn't finish sub-3pm, but it's important so that I can listen to the boys unfold the events of their day.  Some days it seems non-productive to make five trips to the karate studio because none of the classes line up.*****

But, in my heart, I know it isn't.  If nothing else, my boys are going to remember that Mom made some funky change back in the early days of our lives and all the sudden she was THERE.  Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually as well.

Honestly, since God has committed to being there 24/7/365 for me, and He blessed me and Mike with these boys, I think committing my afternoons/evenings to the boys should be plenty good for me, too.

And, even though change is awfully hard at times, I feel incredibly blessed, in so many ways, to be able to say that this is how I'm ordering my life as a Mom.


*My little wink at ya, David Bowie.

**I have to drive carpool, for Pete sake!  But once I'm off duty?  All bets are off.

***Which I'm trying to get in the habit of prepping during the day so I can be more attentive to the kids' needs.  Can you say "Crock Pot"??

****Or, do dishes while kids are showering because they are now "too old for me to see them naked", except The Babe, of course.

*****Drop off at 4pm.  Pick up/drop off at 4:45pm.  Drop off at 5:30pm.  Pick up at 7pm.  Pick up at 8pm.  I'm thinking of charging by the mile.