Wednesday, June 15, 2011

10 Random Things I Don't Want at a Significant Discount

1. Acupuncture
2. Condoms
3. Sushi
4. Brake work
5. Skydiving
6. Blood Transfusions
7. Liposuction
8. Foundation Work
9. Bee-keeping classes
10. Lessons in Spanish

Here's why:

I don't want to be pricked incorrectly, (insert your thoughts here), eat food that will make me barf for eons and possibly kill me, drive a car that might not stop, hit the ground and bounce, get infected blood or a rookie at inserting needles (or both), end up with lumpier/disproportionate thighs, have the house on the block whose main design features are "cracking/shifting/doors that won't close", learn I am highly allergic to bees after the first twenty stings, or accidentally tell the border guard "Yes, I am transporting drugs across the border!" when I think I am disclosing Mexican VANILLA.

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