Bookish

This post is dedicated to my Dad, who is the biggest reason I am a reader.

I'd be lying if I said there was anything but joy, joy, joy over here in the Nowell household.

I'd also be lying if I didn't disclose that the three joys should have been written in SARCASM font.

We've had to settle no less than three different kid-to-kid tiffs involving our kids vs. kids not named "Nowell" over the past few days.

We've spent our time coaching one of our sons about lessons that, had we not been put in a really foul, fallen world, wouldn't have even been an issue.

And I look like someone stuck me with a turkey injector and filled me up with mystery fluid. The scale shudders every time I walk by it, as if to conclude "YOU, lady, are going to BREAK ME!"

But, instead of dwelling on what should have been, what would have been better, and what could be, I'm going to tell you some exciting news.

I'm pregnant!

HA. Kidding. That's news from almost seven years ago.

Current news: I finally organized our book shelf after almost three years!

That's REALLY big news considering it took me finding a bookshelf, creating room in the budget, having it shipped here, road testing it for two weeks before deciding it could stay, and waiting another three months for the attic to be cracked open and Christmas boxes to issue forth, before I wouldn't sound like a nagging wife when I asked "And, would you mind getting just one more box for me? PLEASE?"

Implicit in that question was the fact that this was the 500 lb. box that had been used for two consecutive moves and was suspiciously looking like it could collapse under the weight of a flea. And that was before it was taped together with adhesive that, I'm pretty sure, has since been recalled by Scotch. Twice.

The box proved its crankiness by almost falling apart on the stairs in Mike's abdomen/lap where I could do absolutely nothing but stand at the bottom rung and say "Let me know if I can help."

But, after all the waiting and drama, the books made it to our room. Which is when it got depressing.

See, I KNEW I had several books to read that were already on the shelf. What I didn't realize was that the attic box-o'-books was a treasure trove of its own.

Which means that I have exactly SIXTEEN books that I've either barely cracked the spine on or that are partially read that I thought were worth the price of admission, worthy of borrowing, or I accepted as presents and didn't immediately resell at Half Price Books.

And because I know today is the first day back to work, school, and all things routine, I am going to help you stay in vacation mode by thinking about books. Books stimulate the need for a sugar-rimmed margarita, an ocean view, warm, tropical breezes and a cabana boy with more fruity drinks. Books take you on adventures you didn't know you could afford. And, no, I'm not being paid for this drivel by the Author's of America.

I also hope, that in sharing the books I have on my shelf, that I'll stimulate that little part of your brain that thinks "I need to give that to ____" or "I need that myself".

SEE! Look at me giving of myself in the season of giving! Not only will you still be on vacation figuring out your next read, but I'm also helping you Christmas shop! And it isn't even 10am yet.

You can thank me later.

And, now, in no particular order, other than left to right, the book list you've been waiting for...for one paragraph. Actually, half the list, since I have so much commentary. Follow-up tomorrow.

My Fair Lazy (Jen Lancaster)
Progress Meter: 1/3 done but a definite do-over since I don't remember a word.
When I need a cheap date with a snarky girlfriend who says most of the things I think but don't actually say, I pick up Jen. She has one of the sharpest, most sarcastic tongues in the entire world, which translates to naughty fun.

In all honesty, I'm trying to tame the snark/sarcasm monster in my life, so this may be the last fake auto-bio of Jen's that I read.

SNIFF.

If You Were Here (Jen Lancaster)
Progress Meter: not started

This is Jen's first stab at writing a novel that isn't directly about her life. I'm not entirely sure I'm going to like it, but Mike gave it to me on Mother's Day, at my request, so I could give it a stab.

Word on the street, or her website, is that she's working on another book. That translates to "Read fast, before Mother's Day comes again and Mike needs an easy idea!"

Underdogma (Michael Prell)
Progress Meter: 1/4 done. Skim highlighting to refresh memory.

If you are conservative or just like to make fun of conservatives or like to eat their ideas for lunch, this is a book for you. The subtitle says it all: "How America's Enemies Use Our Love for the Underdog to Trash American Power"

Pretty much the antithesis of Jen Lancaster. I'd going to have to learn to drink scotch neat to prove my worth at this table.

Facing the Facts/The Truth About Sex and You (Stan and Brenna Jones)
Progress Meter: not started

This is book four in the Christian book series "God's Design for Sex" and is designed for 11-14 year olds. This is on my shelf because I need to read it before next summer, when I'll require Nickels to read it and discuss it with me and Mike.

If you are kin to someone with young children and you can say the word "SEX" out loud, in the light, without blushing, the series would make a lovely, and unexpected, present. In fact, this might be your best way to get out of the "drawing pool" for gifts, if you are sick of buying for your fourth cousin's, three times removed, dog.

Shattered Dreams (Larry Crabb)
Progress Meter: not started

This is my neighbor's book that was loaned to another neighbor, who passed it to me because she didn't have the time. Oh the farce!

The premise is that we all have dreams that didn't survive life. How do we pick up from where the dream failed and move forward? I'm sure this Christian perspective will be worth the time.

A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
Progress Meter: not started

One of my best girlfriends gave me this book for Christmas the year Nickels was born (1999). It is an astounding 911 pages long. Since she eats small books as appetizers on her way to inhaling 2,000 page books as a main course, all on a lazy Saturday afternoon, I'm pretty sure she didn't get the solid gold irony of giving this to me three months into my first child.

But, I'm not one to give up! I'll have that sucker read sometime in a year that begins with 20.

Prayer (Philip Yancey)
Progress Meter: not started

Inhale the name. Yes, he's just that good. I know this will be a wonderful book, filled with tons of Christian inspiration and commentary, if I can just get it started.

The Jesus I Never Knew (Philip Yancey)
Progress Meter: not started

What kind of person was Jesus? Mr. Yancey wants me to know. In my spare time.

Searching for God Knows What (Donald Miller)
Progress Meter: not started

By every indication, this book was a Christmas gift, since I found my wish list from about eight years ago in it as a make-shift book marker.

Those of you who enjoyed Blue Like Jazz will recognize Mr. Miller's name. That book was the sole reason I asked for this one. With chapter titles such as "Imposters: Santa Takes a Leak", this is sure to be another page-turner.

The Seven Pillars of Health (Don Colbert, MD)
Progress Meter: not started

The fact that I haven't even cracked open this book or removed the price tag from the upper right corner should come as no surprise. If it doesn't, please scroll to the top of the post and look for commentary on my bloated body.

Of all the books on my shelf, this is probably the most necessary read.

A Dad-Shaped Hole in my Heart (H. Norman Wright)
Progress Meter: 1/4 done but a do-over...don't remember a thing.

There was a time in my life where I blamed everyone around me for all the ills of my life. That blame game has stopped now as I've worked to forgive others and myself and move forward.
This book was purchased when I thought I could fix everything by figuring out my relationship with my Dad and see if not knowing my birth parents fit into why I was still searching.

Turned out, it was all about God. Go figure.

But, I'm still going to read the book because I think remembering how it used to feel is helpful to not going back to times when you felt hurt. And, who knows? Maybe my knowledge of this issue might help someone else someday.

Well, if you aren't as bored as a gourd by now, tune in tomorrow for another thrilling installment of "The Books MommaJ Purchased, Was Given, and Borrowed That She Can't Manage to Find the Time to Read".

Word on the street is that it will be a page-turner!