Time Out Chair

One of the lovely things about this time of the year is that the mail box is filled with magazines peddling junk that no body in their right mind would actually purchase, even if they were quadzillionaires.

See exhibit A:  the "Time Out Stool".*  In navy.

First, this is exactly how I picture Little Jack Horner, of children's poetry fame, looking after his mother discovered he had stuck his finger in the Christmas pie. 

Second, is that timer made of glass?  If the answer is "yes", then I can already tell you it has a design flaw...the very first thing to get kicked, while a child is sitting on this thing, pissed as a hornet, would be that glass.  And, BOOM!  Sand all over the house. 

Even the website mentions that this thing isn't a toy and requires adult supervision, just in case of "rowdiness, rough-housing, and buffoonery" which could "cause it to break".

However thought ordering this was a good idea DOESN'T HAVE KIDS.  They wouldn't be in time out to begin with if they weren't rowdy, rough-housing buffoons!

And five minutes?  Are you serious?  Five minutes worth of sand?  HELLO.  I start at 20 minutes and work my way UP.

But, if you have angels who wouldn't 1) kick 2) need more than five minutes of time out and 3) have $69 plus tax and shipping to spend this holiday season, I'd highly encourage you to buy one of these.

I'll come to your house, without my kids, and admire it.

*Mine is a fashionable, Rubbermaid, plastic gray stool.  And, under $15, including tax.